Backwards, forward, and away we go, looking at past faults stealing the show, worried for new days not even here, backwards, forward, living in fear. Backwards, forward, gaining no traction, jumping conclusions from action to action, becoming scattered by things that don't matter, backwards, forward, living in tatters. Backwards, forward, always in a hurry, tripping over myself to borrow more worry, one day I'll realize from years of being burned, backwards, forward, lessons to be learned.

I feel so broken in the deepest of spaces, my mind is numb in so many places, it's all I can do to keep up life's paces, and so, I write. There's so much pain inside of me, my tears could fill the deepest sea, I don't feel like others understand me, and so, I write. I'm looking for a purpose, a reason to hope, still trying to find a way to cope, some days I'm at the end of my rope, and so, I write. Venting my feelings, wanting to shout, I've found a way to get it all out it, helps me learn what life is about, and so, I write.

Don't let the voices of the past rob you of your future, What they said against you was from their own insecurity, They don't know you and what you're capable of You might not even realize what you're capable of, but trust me, You've been refined in the fire You're going to shine and do incredible things

You can't pour from an empty vessel, although for years you've tried You were robbed of your voice, your will, your very essence, Eventually you were broken You made the agonizing decision to leave, Some won't understand forgive them, how could they, They didn't live your nightmare

Nobody knows the mask that I wear it looks like confidence but smells like fear if I could seem perfect than no one would know what really happened all those nights long ago A little girl with her innocence forever betrayed with nowhere to go she was silent and stayed in time the pain was too much to bear so she cried out for help to the closest one there Her voice might as well have been silent cries for this one meant to trust said, "They're dreams, they're lies" That was the day trust died inside and up went the walls forever to hide shame was her shadow it now clings to her skin a prisoner of another man's sin.

I thought my heart was tailored for you little did I know how adept you are with scissors cutting me to bloody ribbons

Trying to make sense of an abusive childhood is like throwing Jello at the wall and expecting it to stick why do people do what they do You tried to stop the bleeding in your heart mother but you couldn't so you caused me to bleed too so you wouldn't have to bleed alone

I'm looking for a purpose Why am I on this earth? I'm searching for meaning Trying to find my worth I look into the mirror A stranger I see What's it going to take To discover the real me? I feel like a lost soul Going from day to day Every single morning It's the same instant replay I'm a patchwork quilt Of unanswered questions Of unfulfilled dreams Broken in spirit I'm coming apart at the seams Not making a difference Leaves a whole in my heart I'm a perpetual encore Falling apart

You're trying to find the words Some hurts are so intense they're difficult to describe You feel like the walking wounded inside How do you explain the anguish of having your heart broken in a million little pieces? The ache never goes away It's raw, and it's relenting You try to find ways to forget the sadness, Even if just for a moment But the heart has its own memory You try to go on You paint a smile on your face because you can't begin to explain how broken you really are inside You have a deep longing that is never satisfied If only you could see them one more time.

I know that I should reach out I'm feeling anxious and depressed I'm going through a crisis and I'm really feeling stressed It's difficult to explain From the outside looking in To understand the dark places Of where my mind has been It doesn't make much sense, I know My life seems rather good I'd trade these feelings in a heartbeat If only I could I don't mean to shut you out I don't mean to push you away I'm sorry for my actions And the things that I can't say It's how I have to process It's the way I have to cope Knowing that you still care Gives me strength and hope A hug, a text, or a call Can show me that I'm not alone, and worthy, after all The words don't have to be eloquent You don't need much to say Just let me know you care And see if I'm okay I'm totally overwhelmed And in over my head I can't seem to reach out Can you reach in, instead?